National Tribal Clearinghouse on Sexual Assault

Moving Beyond Individual Care to Community Healing - Part 2

August 22, 2024 • NTCSA • Season 2 • Episode 2

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Due to the nature of this podcast, please know the content may be difficult to hear and can be triggering to those listening. Please take all necessary precautions and care while listening to this podcast.

In this podcast, Christina alongside co-host Miranda Encina, will continue to dive into a discussion filled with honesty, heart, and hope. They will explore life-saving tools of self-care and community care. They will venture into ways organizational culture can play a pivotal role in either nurturing healing or perpetuating harm for survivors of sexual assault and abuse. Miranda & Christina’s unique identities, experiences, and cultural insights add depth to this conversation, bridging diverse perspectives.

This episode promises stories of resilience and practical strategies for self-empowerment and community healing for those who provide service and care to survivors of sexual assault and abuse. Tools that providers can utilize for themselves and for those they work with. Listeners will walk away with actionable recommendations, reflective practices, and perhaps even a newfound sense of humor to face the challenges experienced while working in this field responding to survivors of sexual violence. Join Christina and Miranda in this engaging and heartfelt dialogue that is more than a podcast – it’s a lifeline to anyone seeking light in times of darkness.

Presenter Bios:
Christina Love is an Alutiiq/Sugpiaq Egegik village tribal member and survivor of domestic violence, sexual assault, and trafficking. Christina’s story of transformation – from battling addiction, homelessness, and incarceration to emerging as a pillar of strength – offers a testament to the power of the human spirit and the importance of self-care and community care.

Miranda Encina is a survivor of domestic violence, proud Two-Spirit Indigenous, Chicanx activist, with a profound understanding of the importance of cultural relationships, intergenerational resistance and meaningful connections – Miranda’s lived experience with complex trauma and resilience helps form the work they do to identify, create and implement shifts that validate, humanize, and minimize (re)traumatization within communities.

This project was supported by Grant No. 15JOVW-23-GK-03969-INDI awarded by the Office on Violence Against Women, U.S. Department of Justice. The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this presentation are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Department of Justice, Office on Violence Against Women or the International Association of Forensic Nurses. 

Intro:

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Kelsey Morris:

Hello, and welcome to today's episode. This podcast is brought to you by the National Tribal Clearinghouse on Sexual Assault (NTCSA). Visit www.supportingourcircle.org to learn more through a partnership between the International Association of Forensic Nurses (IAFN) and the Minnesota Indian Women's Sexual Assault Coalition (MIWSAC). NTCSA offers technical assistance training and education on issues related to sexual assault and abuse against American Indian and Alaska Native populations. NTCSA addresses cultural and traditional needs of American Indian and Alaska native victims and survivors, while strengthening training to improve the response to sexual violence within these communities . The NTCSA Project is supported by Grant number 115JOVW-23-GK-03969- INDI, awarded by the Office of Violence Against Women, US Department of Justice. The opinions, findings, conclusions and recommendations expressed in this podcast are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the view of the US Department of Justice. My name is Kelsey Morris, and I'm a project manager with IAFN for the NTCSA Project. I'm a proud member of the Bad River Chippewa people, and I am dedicated to serving as an advocate for tribal populations. Today, we bring back Christina Love and Miranda Encina . Christina is an Alutiiq/Sugpiaq Egegik village tribal member and survivor of domestic violence, sexual assault and trafficking. Christina's story of transformation from battling addiction, homelessness, and incarceration to emerging as a pillar of strength offers a testament to the power of the human spirit and the importance of self-care and community care. Miranda is a survivor of domestic violence, proud two-spirit, indigenous Chicanx activist with a profound understanding of the importance of cultural relationships, intergenerational resistance, and meaningful connections. Miranda's lived experience with complex trauma and resilience helps form the work they do to identify, create, and implement shifts that validate, humanize, and minimize retraumatization within communities. This episode will be a continued discussion between Christina and Miranda as they bring us part two of moving beyond individual care to community healing. In this episode, they will define and discuss wellness as it relates to the individual agency and community. The host will conclude by discussing the concept of root work, providing answers to the questions about what are the things that require nourishment for blooming and growth.

Christina Love:

So, you know, I guess this, this next part is really about defining wellness for yourself or for your agency or community. And , uh, and how do you, how , how would, how would you differentiate between that

Miranda Encina:

Defining , I'm sorry, say that again? Defining wellness. Yeah.

Christina Love:

How would you define wellness for , for an individual?

Miranda Encina:

Hmm . Well, I think that, I think that there are probably overarching themes, right? When it comes to wellness and what people identify as wellness. Wellness, to me could be, you know, having, like I had mentioned, having water, having , um, just like a moment to be able to breathe. Just being able to kind of be in my body and be connected to my body , um, and really try not to do some of that dissociation that you talked about, right? Like, being able to find a balance between being present in my body and needing to not be right for whatever that reason is. So, what are the ways in which I'm nourishing my body? What are the ways in which I'm moving towards things that bring me joy , um, that feel good, right? And for me, like, those are a lot of , of components of wellness that I have and for everybody, I think it could be really different. You know, a lot of the work that I do within communities is, you know, work around intersectionality and really kind of meeting folks where they're at. And intersectionality is a sense of like, all of us have some type of intersectionalities, right? In some type of intersections. All of us have it. And I think the way that it's taught now is from a lens of like oppression and marginalization, right? Intersectionality equals oppression. Intersectionality equals, you know, marginalization, which is not untrue. And the ways in which I like to approach it is to, to shift that perspective a little bit. I want us to look at intersectionality as the areas and places that we find beauty, the ways in which we define wellness, the ways in which we define community and justice, and all of those things, right? And if we are not bringing in intersectionality into the work that we're doing, and understanding that everybody is coming with their own experiences, we're not gonna know how somebody defines wellness, right? Unless we ask, because wellness might be connected to the fact that, Hey, I need to go connect with my mom or my, you know, Abuela or my, you know, whatever, because I need to hear a story, or, you know, that feels important to me, or I need to go play the drums, or I need to hear music. Um, I need to dance. Right? What does that, what does that mean? Um, what, what does wellness mean for folks? And so that's what I think about when you're talking about that and making sure that we are incorporating what wellness means for everybody, that they'll be overarching themes. And we gotta give folks the opportunity to define what it means for them, because everyone's gonna be slightly different Yeah . Based on their own experiences. Um, how do you define wellness? Christina ?

Christina Love:

I , um, I think about, and you know what, and this is, this is why it's so important for agencies to provide this space, to ask this question and have a place where this can become part of , um, of what we do. That it , that if you want the work to be really meaningful, then you have to understand that we are the work. It's, you know, and that we really we're , I know we're gonna , we're gonna , we're gonna talk about root , we're gonna talk about getting to the roots in a minute, root work. Um, but it's anything that I do deliberately for myself that I, you know, I did, it took me a long time to learn how to drink more water. That was really hard. It took me a long time. Like, I'm not kidding. Like, I mean, learning how to not do heroin, it's, it's some of the same pathways. <laugh> Learning to not smoke cigarettes, to not overeat , um, how to take a shower when I need to , um, and do my dishes. Um, the , all of those things took time, and some of it was really uncomfortable. And so, I mean, I think about, yeah, anything that I deliberately do for my wellbeing, so physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and then culturally, you know, but , um, so I'm, I'm getting rest and I'm getting exercise, and I'm eating right, and I swear to God taking magnesium, and I live in a dark place. Um, and vitamin D changed my life. I mean, we're, we're gonna get to, I , I , it's one of the questions I wanna think about in a minute is those small things that really did change my life, and those are some of them , but have a place for emotional, for self-expression. So whether I'm writing it down or I'm in conversation, or I can say the things, you know, I have relationships where that is important to them too. And, you know, and there's time for it. And , uh, it's, we're centered around that, that , um, that I have a voracious appetite for knowledge, and that I get to have these conversations. Like the conversation we're having right now, really scratches that itch on the brain. You know, I'm just like , we are diving into it , um, where there's that flow that can happen, you know, and it just feels nice. Um , and then spiritually , um, being connected to my body is a deeply spiritual experience and being connected to divine for me. And , um, and there, there's a lot of similarities to culture and spirituality that is , um, deeply connecting. Uh , but having some of those practices and having space, you know , where I'm not so burnt out that I can engage in, in some other , um, practices that bring me to my identity, you know , that there is something bigger than me and there's something bigger than all of us. Um,

Miranda Encina:

And how would we know? You know, I think that's oftentimes a question that I, I ask supervisors to ask every staff or coworkers to ask each other, how would I know when you need support? What does that look like for you? You know, because that could mean, like, I'm noticing that Christina's not drinking any water. You know, I'm noticing that like, you haven't taken many breaks, or I'm noticing that you're really showing up in a different type of spirit, and maybe I should check in, right? And so really connecting with each other and asking, how would we know? How would I know if I need to check in on you? You know, I'm gonna be mindful, and how would I know? Um, and being able to have some type of reflection to be able to express that to folks as well. Right? Yeah. When I'm not doing well, I don't communicate as well as I normally do. I may not respond to things as fast as I normally do. I may have, you know, more frustration during the day, or you might notice me doing this or that. Right? How would we know , um, in being able to express that to ourselves and to others?

Christina Love:

Um, well, and I think about the staff that I have , um, people that I've worked with who've committed suicide and , um, having a space, you know, they always said that they were fine. They always said that they were fine. Um , except for in those moments where we could be, where we, where we created a cultural norm where we're not rushed. 'cause that was, you know, that was, that was the really big thing. I remember when I had disclosed to our staff that I had been sexually assaulted, and it was the first time that I was really open about it. And , um, it ended up causing a lot of hurt because people didn't know how to respond. So then they didn't respond. And then when, later when they were asked why, they said, well, they didn't know if we had enough time, and they also didn't know what to , so then they just didn't, you know? And, and I, I understood that, but I, I also understood that in order for survivors in this workplace and survivors to really be served, then we have to create some cultural norms to have space for that. You know, that , um, for you to ask people what they need and have the awareness of what's missing for them or what's different for them, then you also need that yourself. And if we're going from one thing to the next, and maybe we get to eat together, but during that time, we just talk about the surface stuff. And not that this, you know, not that our day isn't gonna be filled with that filler, but we, we have to have space where we can, you know, connect on a deeper level. Yeah . Where it's real.

Miranda Encina:

Mm-Hmm, <affirmative> .

Christina Love:

So next we're gonna talk about root work . It's , um, that we wanted to call this podcast. It's 2024, and we're not doing resolutions. We're doing root work , <laugh>

Miranda Encina:

To the roots .

Christina Love:

We're gonna the roots . And , uh, I , yeah, I wanna give that to you, Miranda. What does that, what does root work mean?

Miranda Encina:

I oftentimes think about, I don't know where I am unless I also know where I've been in some capacity, right? And so, root work for me is thinking about what are always currently present. So if we're thinking about roots, one thing, we went like all over the place with this root work , so we were loving it, right? And we're thinking about, now it's spring and what's coming up, right? And so, root work , I think about it in a couple of different ways. One, I think about what's always, what's always there, right? What is always there? What are at the roots? What , um, what is a consistent thing for me, right? And that could be, that could be a lot of different things. But then at the same time, knowing that the roots are always there, even if we don't see them, what are the things we return back to? What are the things that, that need to be nourished for us to bloom, right? And, and we're at it . We're coming to a point in time where things have been hibernation, and we do that too, right? Humans do that too. We go through these places, especially when we're living in places that are darker for longer parts, or places that have longer days, right? We go to these places where we need rest and we need to recharge. And , um, but the roots are always there. There's a really beautiful image that I love to use all the time, because I worked at a domestic fi violence shelter for a really long time. And every spring, these beautiful tulips would grow. And it always felt so empowering because there were points in times where we didn't see them . We didn't know that they were beneath the surface. We didn't know that those roots were just resting. And in a place where there may have been so much pain and so much trauma and so many stories, there was also this place of growth and beauty. And that was just waiting to be, you know, unearthed. And so, when I think of root work , that's what I think of, right? What are the things that we need to nourish? Where are the places we need to go back to , um, when we need to recharge? And what are the things that we also need to examine, right? Within our organizations? I think about root work and regards to, do we know what the foundations of some of our organizations are, and why some communities might not seek our services, right? Do we know, you know, how the anti-violence movement started? And how far have we gone from that? How far have we gone from the roots of anti-violence work? Um, how much has domestic violence and sexual assault work separated over the years because of all the bureaucracy and money and all of these things? But like, at the roots, it was survivors meeting together to tell their stories, to be witness to each other. So they weren't in isolation and they were in community. Right? Those are the root, that's the root work that we always wanna be doing.

Christina Love:

Oh , I love it. Uh, Dr. Rita Blumenstein , um, who is a Upic educator and healer, she says, the past is not a burden, it's a scaffold to which brought us to this day. We are free to be who we are to, to create our own life out of our past and out of our present. We are our ancestors, and we heal ourselves. We also heal our ancestors, our grandmothers, and our grandfathers and our children.

Miranda Encina:

Us <laugh>. Take a deep breath for that one. <laugh>

Christina Love:

That,

Miranda Encina:

Ugh ,

Christina Love:

That we, we are the work that going in deep and having those reflective practices for yourself, for your agency. How did we get here? Who, who started this, right? Like, those questions you asked , um, who created this? Or, you know, we're not, we're not towing any lines, just because where we wanna ask a lot of questions about why this policy is here, about why this practice is here , um, about who it doesn't

Miranda Encina:

Still work.

Christina Love:

Yes. And yes . Does

Miranda Encina:

It work? Does it serve a purpose, right? Like, does it participate in someone's healing? Because sometimes it's important for us to understand that there were policies and procedures that were put in place that oftentimes have to do with power, right? When we as humans feel powerless, we oftentimes want to control things, and we create stuff to have more control. And those often look like rules, policies, protocols, right? All of these things. And not that those aren't necessarily good, but we have to reexamine them over and over and over again, because the policies that we have now are very different than the policies we had 30 years ago. Yeah. We don't live in the same world as we did before then. And so is it still working? Is it still serving the purpose that we needed to serve? Yeah. 'cause it might need to change.

Christina Love:

Where are we and where and where are we going? Do you have, do you have the scaffolding , um, that's setting you up for success and that's centered around individual and community healing for the next 500 years? Or is it hindering that? And , um, or is it, you know, benefiting only a few, you know , whether to, you know , think about some of the, the larger, the larger picture. So the root work is, is as you've said, beautiful. Sometimes, you know, I think people, it, it , it ends up being synonymous with hard, but it's so beautiful, I think Mm-Hmm . And it's so worth it. And I, and it's not harder than what we're doing <laugh>. And , um, it is a, it's a pathway for us to examine where we have been, where we are, and where we're going. And it's really, it's the biggest difference between being trauma-informed and centering healing, is that, that we, that we look at the root cause of, of how we got here. That we ask those really big questions about why women are harmed than men. Why are L-G-B-T-Q and two-spirit relatives are harmed at higher rates? And , um, and, and we look at all of the other identities and, and experiences , um, not just , um, not just focusing on trauma, but, but focusing on the total identity of everyone involved, and asking the people who have been directly impacted to be at the center and at the front of this, that the , that communities and people who have experienced this harm know what these solutions are, but we've never had access to the resources and the power to change that. And so we wanna make sure that we are dedicating our power and our privilege and our time and our platforms to making that paradigm shift so that individuals and communities who have experienced this harm can say , um, what it is that they need, and have access to the things that are gonna change that for them significantly.

Miranda Encina:

Systemic power can only be changed by collective power, right? By collective community, by folks coming together. Um , that is how we make systemic change. Right. And I am super excited for our time together, and I'm wondering, Christina , we could sit here and talk all day, and I down here also know that we're getting down to our last bit of time together.

Christina Love:

I know, I know. I'm, I'm excited. Um, so our, our really, our last, you know, question , um, before we get into some of our, our takeaways is , um, what are some things that you've done small , um, or big, that have profoundly impacted your life?

Miranda Encina:

Hmm . I would say that creating a routine for ceremony and what that looks like for me, right? So having , um, whether that be having an <inaudible> , whether that be , um, kind of the tending to and caring for something in relationship , um, and in connection to something, whatever that might be. Right? And that could be in any room in my living space. Um, but what are those things that kind of keep me connected and continue to give me rejuvenation and purpose, right? I also think attending to my health, you know, there was , you know, I have an autoimmune. And so making sure that I'm really being mindful of my body and what it's saying and listening to it and being able to attune to that. Does that mean that I need to go get in a bath with some Epsom salt? Does that mean I need to, you know, do some things , um, that kind of relieve some of those pieces? But it has made a profound difference in my life. One, because it keeps me connected. It keeps me connected to my body. It keeps me connected to the present, but it also provides me an opportunity for healing at the same time. Um, so those are some of just like a , a bit of some of the things that I've really kind of held onto . What about you, Christina ?

Christina Love:

Um, I need , um, time to be alone. I love being with my thoughts. I , um, time outside going for a walk. Mm-Hmm , <affirmative> rest. Learning how to rest has been profound for me. That when I take the time to do what I need to do, then I'm able to come back to things with a fresh mind. And I'm actually able to do more work by taking that time off, by taking that holiday or taking that extra day, not waiting till I'm sick, to just take time to do nothing. Um, checking in with myself. So that might mean doing the dishes or not doing the dishes, you know, but really being like, what is it that I need right now? You know? And having that relationship with myself , um, stretching myself to be more and more present. That the healing really is in the now. It is. And learning how to be here longer and longer has been such a gift to be present for my children, for myself, for my relationships, for other people. You know, I, I, I always knew that I needed it , um, when I was holding a survivor's hand, and I was bearing witness to them that I'd be fully with them. That they have everything, everything that I have. I , I'm giving it to them right now. But learning how to do that more and more in everything. There's, there's such a joy that comes from that. Um, because I am , I'm very much a part of my recovery pathway and attitude of gratitude. Um , in the morning I say, thank you. Yeah , thank you for things , um, that were so profound to me in early recovery. And I never wanna lose the awe of it. I am so thankful for water to drink for food. I'm thankful for hot showers and for clothes that fit me, or that's comfortable. I'm thankful for lotion, if you've ever been incarcerated or homeless. Yeah . Lotion is such a sacred thing. Um, I am, I'm thankful to be able to go out to eat and to order whatever I want on the menu. You know, I'm thankful , um, to , um, to be able to dream. Um, and, and , and I'm thankful to be out of survival that I can think beyond 24 hours , um, exercise. I, I, I want to do it more. And it really is such a good thing. I, I , um, play volleyball. I missed volley my volleyball game this week 'cause I wasn't feeling well. But , um, getting out there and participating, I've, I've never regretted it. Never. I , I , it's , it's always, it's so hard, especially as a mom, I'm working full time to get out the door, and I never regret it. Oh ,

Miranda Encina:

Let's see. Creativity, I think of art, creativity, yes.

Christina Love:

Doing something, yeah. That engages in that way where you, where you can't help but , um, figure out who you are that you, you know , dancing,

Miranda Encina:

The vulnerability of dancing could be so beautiful.

Christina Love:

Laughing as much as you can, having those relations surrounding yourself with good people. Yeah. Paying attention to how you feel with people is so important. How you make people feel and how they make you feel is, is one of the, the most important things I think, that we could ever really , uh, pay attention to. Yeah . And be intentional about the way that we show up. And , uh, and grateful for the way that people show up for us. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Uh, that was really wonderful. Um, I wanna give some other reflective practices before we get into anchoring and what we hope. What are some, what are some activities that you think that you could give to people who , um, individuals and agencies who wanna dive a little bit deeper into this?

Miranda Encina:

Hmm . Reflective practices. I think part of this work is also being able to begin asking yourself as an organization, one, are you ready? Are you ready to do some of this work? Because some of the things that I oftentimes see are, you know, folks who are in frontline work are ready, they're ready to do this work, they're excited to do this work, they're ready for the shifts. Um, and then sometimes higher up , those conversations aren't happening, right? So I think really being able to find an opportunity to connect together, just to , to ask yourselves in your organization, what work are you ready to do? And , and if there's some that feel big, what are you willing to do? What are you willing to do in this moment? Right? Because they can be small shifts, they can be small shifts over time. Um, I also think about being able to have conversations that start with the root of ourselves first, right? So do you have a enough structure within your organization that people feel comfortable talking about their root work, talking about the things that they find challenging, the things that they're enjoying, right? And if, if you're not quite there yet, what are the things that need to be created to put some of those things in place, right? Because we really want people to be able to show up people that are working within our organizations and have these reflective questions. And we can't have the reflective questions if we haven't created the environment to be able to do that. Um, so are we connecting, are we identifying with our strength and our purposes? Do we have the same vision and mission? Like, are we on the same path? Is this what we all want to do together? Right? And then beginning to kind of create reflection questions. And there's some great tools out there, there's some great tools out there to be able to have internal , um, reflection around some of these pieces to get you started in this work. Um , what would you like to add, Christina?

Christina Love:

I would say ask for help. You know, if you see someone else , um, doing something that you want, ask them how they're doing it. How did , how did you learn how to do that? And , uh, and for agencies, I would, I would talk to other agencies, you know, and see what they're doing, and ask those questions and create a space where you can bring in people who have been directly impacted, not just as storytellers, but as advisors, as equity auditors, as , um, um, evaluators, as , um, oh , there's so many different languages. We are more than storytellers. And we can tell you , um, what gaps we see. I can walk into an agency and I, I immediately, I can tell you how it feels and I can ask one question and , uh, and, and know exactly what's happening there on the surface. But , um, that tells me a lot about, you know , um, some of the other things. And there, there are a lot of other people that have that ability , um, and want to provide that. And, and staff who are working there, they have so much they could tell you. They, they know. So those, like in supervision, having supervisory practices that are 360, so they're not just this lateral, you know, where I give you an evaluation performance and you don't tell me how I'm doing <laugh>. Mm-Hmm, <affirmative> . Mm-Hmm . <affirmative> . Then we have real, like, reciprocal relationships. So we're not just evaluating me, but we're also evaluating you and we're evaluating our relationship and we're evaluating this agency and my connection to all of these other things, you know? And , um, we're also talking about it , how it feels that it , that it's not just performance based , you know, that we, and I, I promise you that if you start to build in space for emotional, physical, mental wellness, that performance increases. Like the stats are all there. Okay ? Like, give people time off, pay them an equitable pay, and , um, and you will see a higher value of work.

Miranda Encina:

Yeah.

Christina Love:

Um, I think, I mean, and for, for individuals, most of us are pack animals. So if we really want change, we have to do it together. The , like, the likelihood that I'm gonna , um, that I am, this is, and this is such good , so great for me too. If I, if I want to walk more, I need to find somebody to work with. <laugh> . If I wanna drink water more, I need somebody, you know? And that's part of that acute , uh, that uh , that uh , that community accountability. Mm-Hmm . <affirmative> that , uh, that we , um, that we create these relationships, you know? Yeah .

Miranda Encina:

And knowing that you can do it together, right? We need a break room space, but it's filled with old chairs and cluttered. Can we work together five minutes a day to collectively create and build something that we want, right? That we do together can really kind of help with the investment of everybody , um, that's involved, right? Because when we can begin creating it together, we have , uh, a purpose amongst each other and we're able to see kind of results and see what we've created. Right? So definitely doing things together and finding little bits of pieces, it could be five minutes a day.

Christina Love:

Yes. No, I love that. Some , sometimes I , I'll start with a minute. Um, and before we get into the last part, I just wanna come back to that. Like, we are messy and we , you need room for mistakes. You need relationships that have room for mistakes, and you need places that have room for mistakes. This is how we end the oppression of professionalization, is that you allow people to be a little bit more messy. 'cause it's honest. And people are never gonna tell you what they really think, and they're never gonna ask the questions that they really wanna ask if they're afraid of making mistakes. So you, you , um, the , you want to people to get comfortable enough to be a little bit messy. And that's, that's really important. And to know that, I mean , um, all that wellness ebbs and flows. And there are some days I think about when I was in peak , um, physical condition, my mental health was a mess. <laugh> . I , um, my mental health has never been better. And, you know , they like, and it's just, it's, it's just funny how the , the like, and that tomorrow that could change five minutes from now , that could change, you know, that there's no, no guarantee to any of it. Having a baby changes things and , um, and going through a change of our changes of life and , um, and loss and grief and, you know, our successes and how we share all those things. Mm-Hmm . <affirmative> . So having a space where all those things are welcome, every me at every stage can be there.

Miranda Encina:

Yeah. Yeah. So the flexibility, right? Everything is gonna be an ebb and flow. Yeah . It's gonna , we're gonna need some flexibility and something that didn't work five years ago might work great today. Great . Right? And being able to revisit things with an open, open thoughts and multi lenses and knowing that things are gonna change and ebb and flow. And we're humans, we're complex humans.

Christina Love:

Yes, we are. So our last question, as we are coming to an end and we are landing this podcast, what do you hope listeners will take away from our conversation?

Miranda Encina:

Hmm . I hope that listeners will find one, the, the places that our roots connect. Right? Um, I hope that listeners can really begin to think about what are their roots? What are their roots? What are the things that they want to nourish on a day-to-day basis? What are the things that need to go into hibernation for a little bit before it blooms? Um, and really be able to kind of hold those with such grace and , um, support for self, right? And being able to be witness to each other, right? I think one of the most healing things we can do for ourselves and for survivors , um, who oftentimes are so isolated and so silenced and really just kind of pushed away, is the opportunity to be witnessed and be in each other's space in that way can be so healing. Um , so those are a couple of things that I want folks to take away.

Christina Love:

I hope , um, that you have a lot of compassion for yourself wherever you are. If you have related on either spectrum as being somebody who doesn't feel seen or heard or understood, or as someone who isn't seeing or understanding or listening, that there is a reason for all of it. And part of getting to the root is through a lot of compassion, understanding about how we got here and the things that are missing for ourselves. I think about my friends that aren't with us, you know, that have been in this work for a long time, and , um, who will never come back to this work, you know, because , uh, because they took their own life or because they got so burnt out, or , um, they were so harmed by, you know, being in this work for a long time. I think about them. And , um, and I'm thankful to them, you know, that, that because of who they are and who they were, and , um, that I am driven with this intensity to ask these big questions and bring change. You know, there are a lot of places that would hire me today, but I know they wouldn't have hired me 11 years ago. <laugh> 12 years ago. Mm-Hmm . <affirmative> . And that is , uh, that's really where , um, this is at. You know, the, the value of connection and the potential for healing and everything that we do, healing is always present. It's in our conversations. It's in our emails, it's in this podcast, it's in our gatherings. It's, it is present everywhere. And when we bring our attention to it just ever so slightly and gently, things change. It's , it's, it's almost like my focusing on gratitude. And , and it doesn't diminish the hard things that are there. And it doesn't diminish the reality of the heaviness that we have to carry. And , um, the tragedies that we bear witness to. Um, and , um, in that there is, there is hope that things can change. That I can , um, have what I need, that I can be the person that , um, that the person in front of me , um, is needing me to me . And, and it can feel good to , to both of us. Um, I, I hope that , um, that people have people that they feel like they can be their whole selves with that , um, that they can share all of their successes or, or share all their burdens with. And if they don't , um, I, I, I hope that , um, that they will, they'll seek them out. That they will, you know, that will bravely make those friendships that we, that we desperately need, like our lives are pinned on it. I'm so grateful for , um, the people that I have that surround me and I have intentionally asked for them to be in my life. I have said, you are fantastic, and I want us to work together till the end of time. And Miranda is definitely one of them . I think I said, I can't remember what I said. I said something like, I know you and I are gonna work together till we're, we're very old now . <laugh>.

Miranda Encina:

I can't wait. Yes.

Christina Love:

I thank you so much for joining us. Um, thanks for being on this, this journey with us. And I feel so proud of the people who are listening. 'cause if you're listening to this, then you're already asking for things to change. You're already curious. Mm-Hmm,

Miranda Encina:

<affirmative> . Mm-Hmm. <affirmative> .

Christina Love:

And I want

Miranda Encina:

That you , me , on the journey.

Christina Love:

And I, I feel so proud of you. I'm wherever you are, if you are asking yourself if you need to drink a little less or seeking help for , um, taking too much pain medication or illicit drugs, or , um, trying to drink more water or go for more walks , um, or take some more time off or be present with your kids, or eat more of the pizza or less of the pizza, whatever it is. I , I just, I feel so proud of you and I want you to know that you're not alone in any of this. Yeah . And you're not terminally unique <laugh> in that way. And , um, yeah, there are good people out there who, who really want to , um, be on this journey with you. So thank you.

Miranda Encina:

Wonderful . Thank you all so much for being here with us. We really appreciate it.

Kelsey Morris:

Thank you to our host, Christina and Miranda, for providing us with all of the great information shared in today's episode. Thanks to all of you for tuning in to listen to part two today. This podcast was made possible by funding by the Office on Violence Against Women. The opinions, findings, conclusions and recommendations expressed in this presentation are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views of the US Department of Justice, the Office on Violence Against Women , or the International Association of Forensic Nurses. If you would like to connect with an advocate after listening to this episode, please call 800-656-HOPE. That's 800-656-4673, to be rooted to an advocate in your area 24/7 or go to rainn.org. That's RAINN.org for more information or live chat.